Dec01

Chloe Puton: 2 Months of Organized Thought

by kris on December 1st, 2011 at 1:01 am
Posted In: Trying To Understand Chloe Puton (HALP! IT'S A TARP!)

Chloe Puton: 2 Months Of Organized Thoughts.

I’m done documenting this shit, so it’s time to organize all the Chloe Puton shit into an organized mess.

The Last and Final Chloe Puton Rant The Ironically titled first rant documenting a large part of my anger with Chloe Puton. I’m all like “Seriously, yo. There’s a reason why I went over all this shit with you prior to giving up my life.”

In Other News: Trying to understand what kind of immature twat would actually let their boyfriend go through the process of giving up their apartment, job and purchasing insurance before breaking up with ‘em.

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Oct01

Last and Final Chloe Puton Rant To Friends…

by kris on October 1st, 2011 at 10:15 pm
Posted In: Trying To Understand Chloe Puton (HALP! IT'S A TARP!)

(No Longer) The Final Chloe Puton Rant to Buds and Buddettes.

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Jan06

Oh Internet, You Devilish Fool.

by kris on January 6th, 2012 at 10:51 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

The only person currently more intrigued with Mr. Lanzano is….

One second, must consult internet. Internet, tell me your SECRETS!

“K, dude.”

“We Have…Many Google Searches for Michael Lanzano and Chloe Puton From…67.163.114.29 Front Royal Virginia!”

Internet, Thanks. But Who Keeps on Googling this dude and why does she keep re-reading the same things over and over again.

“Oh, Sorry. It’z Graham, Becky. ”

Kinternet. Thx.

and this is how you interpret access.log and then ask the internet nicely. lol.

 

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Dec01

Facebook’s Suggested Friends

by kris on December 1st, 2011 at 1:55 am
Posted In: Things

As everyone reading this knows, I’m super fucking paranoid when it comes to my online privacy. Yet, for the most part, I’ll toss it aside to use facebook. I don’t toss all my privacy away when I use facebook, though. I limit myself to just over 100 “friends” and basically chosoe the strictest option for every privacy setting.

Who Can Look You Up By Name and Deets? Friends of Friends ↓ Read the rest of this entry…

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Nov30

It’s Nice To See That Chloe Puton Is Googling Michael Lanzano

by kris on November 30th, 2011 at 1:05 am
Posted In: Trying To Understand Chloe Puton (HALP! IT'S A TARP!)

As part of my disclaimer, I try and check this at least once a week and I was greeted with:

24.62.135.94 – - [29/Nov/2011:22:47:39 -0500] “GET /2011/11/read-the-disclaimer-who-the-hell-is-michael-lanzano/ HTTP/1.1″ 403 452 “http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=michael%20lanzano&source=web&cd=7&ved=0CEkQFjAG&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.topherkris.com%2F2011%2F11%2Fread-the-disclaimer-who-the-hell-is-michael-lanzano%2F&ei=ip7VTraSAuLx0gHzz6SICw&usg=AFQjCNEzTlhuGNeqfFHT5z52UqIfnwCHng” “Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; Intel Mac OS X 10.4; en-US; rv:1.9.2.24) Gecko/20111103 Firefox/3.6.24″

Or in layman’s speak – Chloe Puton just happened to be googling for “Michael Lanzano.” Not sketch at all.

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Nov20

Read The Disclaimer: Who The Hell is Michael Lanzano?

by kris on November 20th, 2011 at 3:06 am
Posted In: Trying To Understand Chloe Puton (HALP! IT'S A TARP!)

As I’ve always said, if you ask the internet nicely, it’ll tell you. It didnt tell me he was living the dream: getting your dick wet in a 23-year old is quite the accomplishment for a 31-year old. Congrats Mike.

Regardless,

At first, I couldn’t figure out why the hell I was getting hit by Westchester, New York. Had to investigate, had to ask questions. I said, “Internet, reveal your secrets to me!” and of course, with a little bit of shell scripting, the internet did reveal it’s secrets to me.

Susan Lanzano, why must you disregard my pleas for compliance. All I asked was but a single thing and that was to be left alone. Now why would someone…ah, yes. Michael Lanzano.

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